Most of us keep a few. We call it our right to privacy or nobody else’s business. We tell ourselves it’s too complex for other’s to understand; perhaps we fear the judgement that accompanies the lack of understanding. Most of us believe we are successful at keeping some aspect of our experience a secret. It’s the nature of the belief that we are all separate, distinct and engaged only through the five senses of our physicality, that lends power to the idea that we can keep secrets.
The good news is: this belief is as accurate as the belief that the world is flat is accurate. The bad news is for the secret-keepers: in the subtle realms of emotion and thought, we are all connected; secrets are impossible.
The secrets we keep from others; the secrets we keep from ourselves – all of them are illusion from the expanded awareness of Life. The pretense we maintain to support the illusion of privacy and the ability to keep hidden what we don’t want others to know is, I believe, one of the primary causes of emotional distress in our culture.
A great deal of effort goes into sustaining a false persona/personality. That’s what it takes to keep a secret – a continual masking and dissembling of our authenticity. The ultimate result is a fragmentation; a lack of congruence, if you will, between who we truly are and what we pretend. What secret is so precious to be worth the loss of our authenticity; our wholeness of being?
During my years as a practicing psychotherapist, I saw many clients. All of them carrying secrets that bound them into patterns of distress. For many, they weren’t even sure what the secrets were anymore. So inextricably woven into the fabric of their beliefs, the fragmentation so complete, they only knew they were in distress.
The good news is: it’s an illusion. Secrets are not possible. They always show up – sometimes in the pattern of relationships, sometimes in a physical condition, sometimes in personality disorder. The truth is: there is no way to hide who we are from anyone but ourselves… and even then, it’s inevitable that we look into a mirror and see our reflection sometime. No matter the justification for keeping a secret (and there are a million of them), the illusion of secrecy is the truth.
So I offer this option: Come into the open with who you are. Welcome all parts of yourself into the light and light of All You Are. If you are engaged in an activity that you truly believe must be kept secret, let that activity go. You will find great relief from the shame or guilt that always accompanies a behavior that “must” be kept in the dark. I promise.
At first, it may seem awkward to acknowledge and integrate the whole of who you are. As the fragmented aspects come more into conscious awareness, the recognition of your inner workings may cause shifts in your perceptions and understandings about what is truly important and inspire changes in lifestyle. Sometimes, these changes are a challenge to embrace; but change is inevitable… that’s as true as secrets are impossible. You may as well ride the change as an opportunity.
Imagine your world without secrets. Imagine being true to who you are where ever you are and with everyone. Imagine the personal power and well-being of being this “you”, clear and free and conscious in all of the choices you make. Authentic. Imagine how it feels. Imagine how you feel to others and how much more easily others come present and alive with you in your congruent openness.
The only thing ever hidden by the keeping of secrets is the brilliance of All We Are. Come shine with me.
Thank you. I love you.